Stop playing it safe and saying what is expected, what is acceptable and predictable. Or worse still avoiding the conversation altogether. Instead share those deep thoughts and feelings, share the disappointments, the shattered expectations, the hopes and the dreams.
Make sure what you share comes with good intent – be clear on your intention.
Have the highest intention for yourself and for the other person/people.
Decide what is most important to achieve from the conversation you want to engage in.
Get clear on what you are going to say and just as importantly frame yourself around the kind of listening you are going to engage in – plan to listen with the intent to really understand the other person.
Connect deeply with their situation, their context, their expectations and the outcomes they seek. This means you need to listen beyond the words – listen for their concerns and worries in the language they choose, the gestures, the pace of speech – there are many clues that many of us miss.
I am planning such a conversation with a client and am challenging myself to move way into my learning zone and share thoughts and feelings I may not have dared to do a few months ago. I am stretching into my full potential and feeling the fear and doing it anyway! The very essence of courage I believe.
I invite you to do the same over the next month and let’s share the outcomes.
