It is critical to recall from earlier blogs in this series that feedback brings awareness not action because when receiving it effectively this context is just as important as it was when we explored how to give feedback effectively:
Definition of feedback
Feedback is describing other’s behaviours and outcomes achieved in order to reinforce positive progress or be constructive and assist in the future development of the person. Feedback is all about replaying what they did and what they achieved in a specific situation and describing the impact it had on you, the outcome and the team – only if you personally witnessed the impact on the team.
So when receiving feedback visualise it as the other person holding up a mirror in front of you so you can see and hear what they have been seeing and hearing over a given period of time. Just like the mirror we check out before we leave the house remember it is completely ‘normal’ for us to not always like what is being reflected back at us.
It becomes critical for us to frame feedback as a gift and just like the gifts we receive on our birthday – sometimes we would prefer to put it away in a cupboard so we can re-gift it to someone far more deserving of this little package – because quite frankly “I don’t like it”!
Everyone needs a process for receiving feedback because it is all too easy to jump into the somewhat natural instinct of defending yourself when someone is giving you feedback. We suggest this process to distinguish the 4 very distinct parts of receiving feedback effectively and will produce a BLOG on each of these parts in the weeks to follow:
By segregating the receipt of feedback into these four distinct parts it assists you to feel more constructive and resilient when receiving feedback – because remember our natural instinct when receiving feedback is to justify, blame, deny or defend. That is what makes feedback so difficult.
Sometimes people choose to give you feedback unsolicited and other times you actively seek feedback from them. The process of receiving feedback is different dependent on your involvement in seeking the feedback in the first place.
Either way receiving feedback effectively takes great courage and relies on emotional intelligence and resilience; or as mentioned in earlier BLOGS it is the greatest way to learn as you progress within an organisation. So by investing time and energy into getting ready to receive feedback effectively you are sure to keep the feedback learning loop open – which is brilliant for the success of your career.
